Optometrists Gifts

You should have come in sooner.

"I just got these new glasses from my ophthalmologist – they come with tiny windshield wipers to clean the fog from my mask!"

Cat sitting doing eye test with PUUURRRR on the eye chart.

'You better believe I'm getting a second opinion...CATaracts, my eye!'

"Over here."

Short Sighted Driver.

"Thanks to my new glasses, I can enjoy a good old "bird's eye view" again..."

"Okay, I guess we can turn down the tonometer air pressure just a tad."

A Man with poor eyesight has misjudged the Optometrist's door and smashed into the wall

"With the new year approaching, I was hoping you could help with my resolution...."

Doctor with funny glasses to patient: 'We don't need a radiologist. My new x-ray glasses allow me to see right through you.'

Army officer visiting optometrist having a reading test - Boom, kaboom, wham, pow pow, bang bang.

'Umm.... do you have an audio chart available for the visually impaired?'

"I'm getting ready to have my fortune read to see my future, but first I want to make sure I can see clearly."

"You can always tell when we have new patients who need glasses."

The Joker at the eye doctor.

Cost of medicine

"I'm always making bad decisions can you correct my foresight."

'No-one buys these stylish frames for their eyes, usually it's for their Facebook photo's.'

Opticians Sign With Modern Text Acronyms

A new brand of snacks popular with Optometrists.

"You have beatific vision."

After her laser surgery, Alice was able to read barcodes without an optical scanner.

"Undress down to your underwear and have a seat. The optometrist will be in shortly."

Eye Doctors. Sport Psychologists. Reception. Which focus group are you here for today?

Don't swallow. I've lost a contact.

'He's been like this ever since he had his laser eye treatment.'

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

Now Simon would have nightmares about his mother's failing eyesight.

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

'They might look sexy and seductive but all I want to do is the crossword.'

Lost. Readi

"Oh, please. Lord, no ... I'm only 50! No, please – anything but reading glasses!"

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

Love is Blind.