Optical Pun Enthusiast T-Shirts

'I wish you'd make up your mind - first, you ask me to collect the customers' glasses then...'

Sales chart is buildings in background.

Theatre Masks and Butts

'Marsha, did you file the Peterson account on the cumulus, stratus, cirrus, or nimbus cloud?'

Hospital Departments

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

Musical Eye Test

"Any chance you could do it at a higher resolution?"

"Frosty the Repairman"

'Amazing this pizza looks just like a brain scan of someone who's experiencing apophenia'

'But Doc, I am an eagle: I can't be seen wearing glasses... Can't you prescribe contact lenses?'

Cyclopetrist's Waiting room

'Be fair, George - how do you expect me to find your contact lens in this lot?'

The Coffee Tattoo

A polar bear has slipped and is sprawled out on the ice next to a yellow caution sign that features a slipping figure.

Missing Daylight: So dark. So cold.

Executioner forgetting his glasses.

'My doctor wants me to watch what I eat, so I'm here for glasses.'

Hot Cross Bun

Cat Eye-Exam

'You went for the highlights then?'

"Furry Fries"

That's the trampoline sales, sir.

"I'm always making bad decisions can you correct my foresight."

'Joe said he had some special bulbs.'

Defensive Lineman

"Don't be alarmed, Lois, but there appears to be a pop-up thermometer protruding from your right buttock."

'It quickly became apparent that Optometry was not the right career choice for Errol'. 'Is that the right one? I can't tell!'

"Is everything ok robert? You seem to be a little distant recently."

"Forged in fur"

"People who understand Venn diagrams." "Another circle."

Doomed Romance

William Blake's Seven

"Barkeeper! More chick-peas!"