Optical Pun Enthusiast T-Shirts

'I wish you'd make up your mind - first, you ask me to collect the customers' glasses then...'

Sales chart is buildings in background.

Theatre Masks and Butts

'Marsha, did you file the Peterson account on the cumulus, stratus, cirrus, or nimbus cloud?'

Hospital Departments

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

"Frosty the Repairman"

Musical Eye Test

"Any chance you could do it at a higher resolution?"

'Amazing this pizza looks just like a brain scan of someone who's experiencing apophenia'

'But Doc, I am an eagle: I can't be seen wearing glasses... Can't you prescribe contact lenses?'

Cyclopetrist's Waiting room

The Coffee Tattoo

A polar bear has slipped and is sprawled out on the ice next to a yellow caution sign that features a slipping figure.

Missing Daylight: So dark. So cold.

Speed Bump Ahead.

'Be fair, George - how do you expect me to find your contact lens in this lot?'

Executioner forgetting his glasses.

'My doctor wants me to watch what I eat, so I'm here for glasses.'

Hot Cross Bun

Cat Eye-Exam

'You went for the highlights then?'

'It quickly became apparent that Optometry was not the right career choice for Errol'. 'Is that the right one? I can't tell!'

Defensive Lineman

'Joe said he had some special bulbs.'

"Don't be alarmed, Lois, but there appears to be a pop-up thermometer protruding from your right buttock."

That's the trampoline sales, sir.

"Is everything ok robert? You seem to be a little distant recently."

A guy walks into a bar...

"Furry Fries"

"I'm always making bad decisions can you correct my foresight."

Doomed Romance

"Forged in fur"

Well done, Plimpton. You're hired.

"Barkeeper! More chick-peas!"