Open Relationship Enthusiast Gifts

"As you probably heard me telling Liz, I'd like to start seeing other twins."

Rex Turgid, Secret Swinger

Relationship counselor: 'She started behaving strangely, and our man-machine interface has become unpredictable.'

"You don't whisper anymore."

Paint pots in love

"I don't know about you, but I'm ready to take this marriage full-throttle."

Urns in love

(Man with 'BEFORE sign): 'My wife says I'm a work-in-progress.'

"Maybe what she really wants you to do is rub her tummy."

"I'm not laughing at you, dear-I'm laughing with everyone but you."

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

' You're wonderful.' 'I know.'

'Here's to being in love, in a hurry, and in debt.'

An evening with Stanley Bucholtz, relationship MD,,,tonight: 'Just ONE evening,,,'

Tunnel of Love and the Tunnel of Mutual Respect and Admiration.

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

"Erm, I don't think it meant just before the ceremony!!"

"Of course I love you, I'm just busy with other men."

Hold on

Growing Love

Speech-bubble-head-boy loves think-bubble-head-girl.

'We've entered the 'password sharing' phase of our relationship!'

It's obvious anniversaries are the lynchpin of the big oil conspiracy. What? Husbands forget them. Which leads to wives pummeling them. Which leads to men making sure they don't forget again. All you had to do was mark it in your calendar! What do you think pens are made of? Pummeling will now commence.

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

"My wife - is she still staring at me?"

"I'm looking for a man who has an unwavering character, except when he's talking to me."

'Relax babe, that's me before the operation,'

Going into the relationship, Tom knew Loretta was a package deal.

Love

What are you doing? You promised we'd watch it together!

'Now then, let me explain the rules of this therapy.'

"Too desperate?"

'Would you like a romantic table or are you married?'

'Not an orgasm, just the bed springs, I'm afraid.'

"While you're at it, could you give him some pizzazz?"