Open Marriage Gifts

"Honey, I know I agreed to an open marriage, but maybe we could close it just a smidge."

Just Friends

What an afternoon. Rudy, listen to me. It didn't mean anything. You can't play Xbox 360 all afternoon with a guy and pretend it means nothing. I was drunk! You loved it - all of it. The racing and arcade games, the first-person shooters, but especially ... No ... WWF Wrestling Smackdown. I'm a married woman!

"After six marriages I learnt my lesson and married my divorce lawyer."

"Of course I love you, I'm just busy with other men."

"Do you...enter name...take...enter name...to be your...choose one from the pull down menu...click the I do icon now please."

"Morning, Brad." "Morning, Angelina."

"He's a terrific photographer but weddings are not his specialty."

"And this is my significant mother."

First Church of Whatever Works for You.

"Steve and I live together, but we're getting indicted separately."

'My daughter eloped with a mime...'

'How was I to know that you don't like Marzipan?'

'And do you, Rob, promise to love and cherish Simone, even if she earns more than you do?'

". . . Do you both like and subscribe. . ."

"I just thought maybe we should consider letting ourselves go now instead of waiting a few years into our marriage."

Double Bike

Recycling husband.

'The trial marriage was going okay, until a surprise witness showed up.'

'This is my new husband Gregory -- I don't quite have all the bugs out of him yet.'

Two brides raise a glass.

"It worries me that you keepreferring to our honeymoon as our 'honeymoon period.'"

"Gays and lesbians getting married – haven't they suffered enough?"

'The bad news is, during open enrollment we get to choose between our uncaring, inconvenient plan or another one that's just as bad or worse.'

"If there are aliens visiting earth, I don't blame them for not making contact."

. . . it all started when she wanted her mother in the wedding photos.

"Click here if you accept his terms and conditions."

"So, I hear you swing both ways."

Gay Marriage Protests.

"We've found that patients are more truthful when it's open mic night."

Two brides on wedding cake.

The Gayhorns

Coming home to her house-husband.

'The nerve! We're only three hours late!'

'... Yes, I'd love to go on a date with you. Can I bring my boyfriend?'