Oops Wrong Department Gifts

"Give me a sec and I'll check your order."

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

Dog Dressed to Eat

"This is Briggs, our new department head. He's got an amazing knack for reducing complex problems into easy-to-understand witch hunts!"

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

"Bill is in charge of our Ethics Department."

'The whole floor got together and came up with a few things you could work on.'

"Do you have a minute, Bob? I'd like to speak with you about the concept of 'leadership'."

Dave realised that Clive didn't see problems,only 'challenges to be embraced'.

'The Human Right Act bans ANY cruel or unusual treatment...we may need to rewrite our ENTIRE customer care policy!'

'Daft title. How could you have 'backward' planning?'

'Attention, all department heads: the buck stops there. I've had it!'

"You have a grossly exagerrated view of your own importance. You'll make an excellent department head."

'Looks like we could have a pandemic on our hands.'

The Department Chairs react to the budget cuts.

Now Hiring, 'I was about to ask him if he could work without supervision, when he just wandered away!'

The Milbrook Verney chair in literature. The C.K. Frebish endowment for footnotes.

"Looks good to me, but let's run it by the lawyer first, just to see how illegal it actually is."

'You're popular? Your workers are (GASP!) satisfied?? I'm afraid you're not the right person for the Head of Department job!'

'I like to use the Law as a jumping off point.'

The Department Chairs react to the budget cuts.

"Well, sure, it LOOKS like a straightforward plea to buy our product...but for safety we better run it by the legal department

'Please send us an optimist to run the sales department, and a pessimist to run the credit department.'

'I need you department heads to put out a memo to the employees that they will be working from home...then, start packing...we're moving to Cleveland.'

"It's lonely at the top, but don't you love the solitude."

'Head of Ideas' In and Out trays

Purvison heads our environmentally-conscious growth fund

"I'd eat him, but do you know how hard it is to find a good tech guy?"

Pyramid Of Importance Within An Organisation.