Online Validation Seeker Pillows

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

'You have no idea how hard I've gotta work just to maintain my indie cred around here!'

'Those enormous worldwide internet communities.'

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

'I always feel at the end of the day I could've taken credit for more.'

"I'd like to thank my family, but, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I could've done it without them."

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

"That was before I found this amazing new way to earn $$$ working from home."

"The boss loves the positive feedback he gets every time he says something."

Computer spying.

"Today I'm going to search and scroll and swipe and binge."

"Social media makes it impossible to see, hear or speak no evil."

"I'm Walter Grimes and I approve this drink."

And if you press that one, somebody will come in and tell you what a great job you're doing.

'It turns out it wasn't an Internet scam after all. It was just a really bad investment idea.'

"Remember when we used to waste our entire lives for free?"

'Today we learned if it ain't on Google, it ain't worth knowing.'

'I need my lifestyle validated.'

'This is a very innovative proposal. It can really shake things up around here. Let's not rush into making a decision too fast. I think you should gather much more information than we need to make an informed decision.'

'These online fantasy worlds are great fun. I can be ‘Dave the Accountant' from Birmingham.'

'And whenever I attempt cybersex, my computer freezes.'

"Mom, can we get a pet so I can use its name in answering a password security question?"

'And I have an overwhelming desire to be needed...'

'So you're a billionaire... Now what?' 'Have you learned to clean your room yet?'

How do they know me so well?

"How can I feel validated without my own security detail?"

"What happened today? A bully hacked into the school electronic payments account and stole my lunch money."

"Any plaudits for me while I was out, Miss Jenkins?"