Online Networking Enthusiast Gifts

'How do I get people to visit my...'

"I don't want to be your Valentine yet, but you can follow me on Twitter."

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

Likes: $2.

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"Your MBA and PHD are impressive but what concerns me is your low number of Facebook friends."

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

"Sorry, website closed for lunch."

Addicted to Facebook...lost internet connection.

Man doing a search on a computer

'An encyclopedia? I don't know. Let's look up what it is on Wikipedia.'

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

"I'm being heavily recruited by several other companies."

"She looks just like in your photos."

I work for a not for profit business. Mind you, two years ago it was a 'for profit' business.

"Phil's an expert networker. One drink and he's on schmooze-control."

'Have you picked out a domain name, yet?'

INTERNET MARRIAGE.

"We're staying together for the sake of our facebook page..."

"Alright. What should we watch first - the Youtube video or the comments below?"

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

'Do you have 4G up here?'

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

"The Internet ate my baby!"

"Does the ark have wifi?"

"That's what I love about social media. I can have connections with thousands of people and yet still be completely isolated and alone."

"Hi, I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn."

'I didn't have a glass ceiling I had to break through... I had a golf course I had to conquer.'

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

And elevator with 'up', 'down', and 'pitches' buttons

'You can social network me behind my ears if you like.'

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"