Online Humor Seeker Pillows

"We don't share your information with anyone. Plus, nobody listens to us anyway."

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

'Fetch.'

Due to his low center of gravity, Jake is the greatesr broncbuster ever!

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

Transylvanian backpackers.

The Runaway Horse

Giraffe Umbrella

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

A caveman paints from life

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"I'm just here to pick up some bagels."

National Everything Awareness Day

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

Dragon Hair-dryer.

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'