Online Documentarian T-Shirts

"Here, too, a "share" button?"

'Nothing beats seeing your favourite band play live.'

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

"Oh, come on! Nobody brought a pen?"

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

Kirsten Johnson

They're watching a documentary about safety razors. Sounds like a Schick flick!

Police film evidence

Crocodile

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

Michael Moore creates a UK equivalent of Fahrenheit 9/11

"Ugh! Stop making a drama documentary out of a molehill."

My friend, Ernie, the documentary filmmaker, is producing a series about beverages. One film follows a man's search for the perfect lager. The working title is "The Beer Hunter." He found a group of young women in high school who are fantastic baristas. "Bean Girls." Espresso. Another movie will uncover animosity in the orange juice business. Maybe I should call it "Pulp Friction." And he's examining vineyards and winemakers all over the globe. I'll call the film "Planet of the Grapes"!

'Phoor...watch these sperm whales at it...ah...yes..yes...'

A bunch of global warming skeptics want to join eco club. It's a school organization. You have to let them in. But they just want to harass us with selective facts! Today: Eco club. So? Debate is good. You have :An Inconvenient Truth" to counter their arguments. Oh. Great. Now we'll have to read it.

"I remembered that time you said you wished you had a biographer."

"What do you suppose Ken Burns will have to say about all this in 30 years?"

A fly on the wall documentary.

'I still say these shots need more action.'

Fahrenheit 911.

'Hold it - someone's filming this without permission!'

"Nothing like the History Channel to get you to appreciate these peaceful times we're enjoying."

'Coming up next...more of man's inhumanity to man...in hi-def.'

'If whales are so intelligent, why do they swim near Japan?'

"Those pervs from the nature channel are filming us again."

Ernie is a documentary filmmaker who tells stories of folks in their professional lives -- I think he should wonk on his film titles more. One film looked at the surprisingly competitive cutthroat world of the dry cleaning business. "The Hanger Games." In another, we see astronomers traveling to remote locations to escape light pollution. "The Dark Night." Ernie showed us the bond among young butchers in an increasingly vegan world. "Stand by Meat"! And he told us the story of a man who i

Michael Moore

"What do you suppose Ken Burns will have to say about all this in 30 years?"

A typical Monday. Zombie Truck-Driving Maniacs! South Pole Penguin Love! That's a stupid eco-friendly chick documentary! Insipid, mindless, violent zombie crud! Negotiations commence, nearly a week before date night. Wimp! Blockbuster head!

3rd Wave

David Attenborough

'Great! So that's the film... Now for the sound!'

'I'm freezing...The rich list is a little thin this year.'

"Ok, don't move. I want to capture the drama and intrigue of your life."