Online Defenders T-Shirts

It's a scam, Ernie. You are not a prisoner in a cyber war, and you don't have to give your name, rank and credit card number.

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

Second lifeReal life.

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

Spammatic blaster - gun to shoot pop-up ads.

Privacy - Surveillance

'Maybe a firewall isn't enough to protect our computer from worms and viruses. That's why I additionally installed this fence!'

'Jeff is a tackle on his online college football team.'

'Well look, here come the hackers!'

"Hack back with all you've got!"

"These targeted ads are getting out of hand."

Things that go beep in the night.

"I want one that detects intrusions by hackers, then blows their computers to bits!"

"We've updated our privacy policy...it's so private we can't even tell you."

"That didn't work either! I'm telling you, this is one AGGRESSIVE virus!"

Quadruple dark hot chocolate. Whoa, everything all right? Sure, yeah, great. I'm a journalist and writer in an era in which the printed word has been totally devalued by free distribution of information on the internet. Can I pay in prose? Point taken.

Wall Street lights the American Dream on fire while citizens try to burn Wall Street.

"Are you sure you updated the anti-virus software?"

Bob soon began to hate his new anti-spam software.

"Brutus! Attack with reasonable force!"

'The staff are healthy enough, it's the computers that keep getting a virus!'

Goal

"Hi, I'm the new IT-security-expert! Where is your server room? I want to see if I can overcome your firewall!"

'These computer viruses are getting more and more powerful.'

Spam.

I'd rather be phishing.

"Somebody in Boise needs my help. Run a credit check."

"With all the cybercrimes corporate had to bring in a new guy, Supergeek."

"The tricky bit is finding some UK infrastructure that's working to switch it off."

Cyberwarfare

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

'How long did you try before calling?'

'Well, I told you not to open that attachment!'

Computer virus

'Crusher' Collins: Data custodian by day, data bouncer by night.