Old Wives' Tale Aficionado T-Shirts

'You know they say if you throw a baby into the water it'll swim? ... not true.'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'

Don Quixote

Falstaff

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice Climbs Through The Mirror.

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

"If she thinks I'm just gonna come running on home, wagging my tail behind me..."

'This bottle of whisky will give you 'Dutch courage', it's the best I can do.'

"Just go ahead. It's my last day here and I hate this place."

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

"So it was a performance enhancing drug."

"Why do you automatically assume that I'll fly too close to the sun?"

"I crawl that I may savor the richness and diversity of people and places along the way."

'Wow, I can't believe she fell for that granny getup.'

'Well, apparently your mother was right. Your face is finally stuck that way.'

"Good evening, Charles - windy out, is it?"

'But, Marshal, if I'da built the gallows any higher, ol' Mad Dog here mighta got seriously hurt!'

Frank and Ernest Updated Fairy Tales. Do you mean fair like "pretty" or fair like "evenhanded"?

"I myself don't see much hope for an inter-utensil relationship."

Little Dutch Boy in an Hourglass

Polly Rescues the Charitable Grinder

Why don't we wait until we know each other better before I tell you how I got the name 'Humpty'.

Robin Hood.

Don Quixote

Ugly sisters

'When I was your age we had to carry our water from the spring in a bucket...and then we'd get it out with a dipper!'

The Windmill Gets Attacked (Don Quixote).

'Bo-Peep was fed-up with losing us all the time, so she has us all wear these radio-locator collars now.'

"Alexa, Alexa on the wall..."

Alice in Wonderland - The Gryphon.

"I thought Marley said I'd be visited by three ghosts."

'I walked 5 miles to school and on top of that, there were no vasectomies. In my day you got neutered!'

Adam sees note from Eve: Gone for a walk. Your dinner's in the apple tree.