Lover Of Old Tales T-Shirts

"I crawl that I may savor the richness and diversity of people and places along the way."

'When I was your age we had to carry our water from the spring in a bucket...and then we'd get it out with a dipper!'

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'

Don Quixote

Falstaff

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice Climbs Through The Mirror.

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

Alice in Wonderland: Alice and the Dodo.

"Long Johns Silver."

Cinderella mopping up

"Why do you automatically assume that I'll fly too close to the sun?"

"No, let down your hair!"

'I've been knocking for ages!'

"Well, I just experienced my first misophoia trigger."

Signs grampa has run out of 'When I Was Your Age' stories.

'But, Marshal, if I'da built the gallows any higher, ol' Mad Dog here mighta got seriously hurt!'

David Anderson vs. Goliath

Goldilocks reads note from three bears: Gone for a walk in the woods. Your porridge is on the table.

Frank and Ernest Updated Fairy Tales. Do you mean fair like "pretty" or fair like "evenhanded"?

Polly Rescues the Charitable Grinder

"Triple espresso." "Forget it, Uncle Mort." "Let's face facts: You're not as young as you used to be. Too much caffeine can literally kill you." "Poppycock! Do you know who you're talking to?" "When we stormed across Europe under Patton, my tank battalion got stuck in the mud during a torrential downpour. Arty Lang switched my canteen full of rainwater with one full of tank gas. So I replaced his tank's timing belt with tree bark and dental floss." "That big galute and I were always pr

King Midas: The Golden Years

"He's really gone uphill, hasn't he?"

Ugly sisters

Robin Hood.

Adam chasing Eve with a leaf blower.

Achilles needs first aid.

The Windmill Gets Attacked (Don Quixote).

Frank N. Stein: 'Sir, there's a mob here to see you. Should I send them in?'

"Alexa, Alexa on the wall..."

"Our plan has failed. The elephants of Hannibal are not frightened by our little mice."

' Look at these yolk stains.I figure he was killed here,then dragged out to the wall to make it look like an accident.'