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"I myself don't see much hope for an inter-utensil relationship."

Little Dutch Boy in an Hourglass

"Just go ahead. It's my last day here and I hate this place."

"Now I wish I hadn't gotten him that bow and arrows for Father's Day."

"I guess I'm more of a why-wolf."

'It's a note...It says I.O.U. one pot of gold.'

Where are they now?: Office of Management & Budget - Grumpy.

A vampire in a canoe.

Don Quixote

'He took from the rich and gave to the poor? It sounds like wealth redistribution.'

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

Falstaff

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

"Oh, this? Crazy story..."

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

"You wake up after 100 years and the first thing you do is check your phone?"

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

Astronaut finds used firework on the moon.

"If she thinks I'm just gonna come running on home, wagging my tail behind me..."

"Its been on the market for over two years. The estate agent reckons it's something to do with negative edibility!"

Hansel and Gretal

The Gingerbread Man Hits 50.

"He never passes by without a mischievous smile."

"It appears to be a giant boil, sire."

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

Cinderella insisted on always having glass slippers - even into old age...

"Which one is yours?"

Trueman Dewayne Lafayette: collector of the imaginary,

Grimm's Fairytales - The Turnip; Student Tricked into 'Sack of Knowledge'

'...and then the DOW rallied six hundred points and the three bears felt like idiots...'

'Not only didn't he turn into a prince, but he gave me these awful warts!'

Little Red Riding Hood in Dallas

Beauty and the Beast

Mephistopheles