Old West Comedy Lover Gifts

'I used to be a horse whisperer - Then I discovered they're all deaf!'

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

Primitive magician

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'I don't know who you are stranger, but if you mess with big Gus you'll be in your coffin by dawn!'

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

'This snuff video you sold me just shows people taking snuff.'

Dial-A-Pizza van arriving at Western Fort

Son, you'll never be quick on the draw unless you pull your dang pants up.

'You may be a jolly happy soul Frosty, but you stink at poker!'

"..Not cloudy all day."

Cowboy

"For centuries scientists have wanted to develop a method to help ants feel like cowboys. Today that quest is at an end."

"I've decided to replace the sod floor with tile."

"Happy slime trails to you, until we meet again!"

"Giddyup."

"Caw blimey Missus"-"He's a Carry-On Crow"

"Watch yourself, stranger. I've got an itchy trigger finger."

"If we don't find a place to charge these batteries we ain't gettin' this herd of tumbleweed to Kansas City by sundown."

TV Guide: Cowboy Cowboys.

"You didn't shake out your boot."

"What?! You didn't say nuthin' about this bein' a yo' mam joke battle!"

"Barkeep, gimme a shot of your finest whiskey." "Not so fast there, partner." "Oh, sorry. A... sh... ot... of... yo... ur... fin... est... whis... key...."

'So much for the sheriff who was going to clean up our town.'

"You're gettin' too big for your dang britches."

Not at all O.K. Corral

"Yes, I can help you with your loan questions. I'm the loan arranger."

"Say your prayers, liturgies, Tefilah, Daily Salat, Sacred Mantra, Ritual Incantation or the secular affirmation of your choice, Varmint!”

The Mild, Mild West.

Cowboy with a 'Friends of the 'earp' T-shirt

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

Notary

Boot Hill: 2nd Fastest Gun In The West RIP

Uke Free Zone