Old-time Prospector Gifts

How to find gold.

"You're on a what?!"

'There are only three things that matter in this world, son... bottom line...'

A word from James Cameron. . .

'Put that down your fool! It's a bone of contention.'

'We're getting closer - That's a goldfish.'

"I asked you to send me over a prospectus!"

"Trepanning for gold"

Early House Hunting.

"Archaeologists discovered several enormous ancient cities buried under the jungles of Cambodia. That means the Khmer civilization was the largest empire on Earth from the 9th to the 12th centuries. That changes everything about our conception of the Middle Ages. What was your conception of the Middle Ages? Well... it was... well, knights, maidens, dragons... mostly dragons. And elves."

"Yes, but the trouble is he always wears that mysterious smile."

"I'm sleeping in today. I got in late from last night's orgy."

"I'm trying to find a new element."

How can you read that comic strip Blondie? Its about a kinder, simpler time. It's about ancient history. They do the same material over and over. Exactly. I can count on it. Not like your stupid Pearls and Get fuzzy. Oooh, look how angry and edgy they are. They're sooo clever! Your whole gig is being angry and edgy. Look, I'm setting Candorville on fire.

Department of Archaeology Floor Plan

"If there are nuggets in the sluice, let's dine out tonight."

'Talk about advanced technology! It even has a beer holder!'

'Oh, I'm not looking for Gold, I'm checking for bear-traps...'

'You're too heavy on metals and too light on equities.'

'Look, Charlie, it's a bonanza!'

'Is the fire included?'

Wagon

A comment on the Gold Rush.

'This is such an appropriate way for us to celebrate our GOLDEN wedding anniversary."

'Forty years out of touch with civilization, but with this $5000 worth of gold, we'll live like kings for the rest of our lives.'

'Why don't you just invest in gold?'

"... And how long have you had this irrational fear that you'll never get a mortgage?"

Guy with gold mining equipment holds sign saying 'them thar hills'.

"Do you mind?!"

"It's a quaint, one room, no bath, no half-bath, no basement, no windows, hole-in-a-boulder studio."

"Gee Hank, you've found comedy gold."

"You're sitting in my place!"

"Do we look like investors in high-tech funds to you?"

"Curly-Bill! Git over here... nuggets as big as yer corns!"

Archeology Dept...'Diggin' the past, Dude!'