Old Testament Admirers Pillows

'The Lord spake to Moses? You mean voice mail?'

'Yes, all at once!'

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"We've been wandering in the desert for forty years. But he's a man—would he ever ask directions?"

Ezekiel and his Dog: "Have you been in the valley of dry bones again?"

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

Ten Commandments

'Wow! It didn't take long to lose that new ark smell.'

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

"Mark, you have to stop calling John's gospel 'Fan Fiction.'"

''No other gods before me'? Oh - You're one of THOSE types.'

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"Does the ark have wifi?"

'Could you carve the Commandments in stone? -- otherwise they'll think I made them up.'

'What about three-day Sabbaths?'

Horseshoes...Samson-style

'Let your people go? - after all the trouble I went to getting them full employment?'

Joseph and his coat

"I was kind of hoping just to tell them what they want to hear...."

"If he doesn't like the hand puppet routine, I'll try running the burning bush idea by him."

"Looks like we're in trouble now...he's got four bars on that thing."

"Daniel, I seem to have dropped my keys, could you look around and toss them up."

"Yeah, but good luck getting it peer-reviewed."

Noah's Nark.

'I just glanced back at Sodom and Gomorrah for a second...'

'This is a painting of your grandfather.'

"It says God created heaven and earth, then there was light. Why didn't He do it the other way round, when He could see what He was doing?"

"Are we there yet?