Oil Company Professional T-Shirts

First and last day as oil company spokesman...

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

Spot the difference.

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

GAS PRICES AT PUMP

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'The good news is we've discovered a vast new oil resource. The bad news is we need a space ship to get there.'

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

Terrorism leaves Iraq and moves on to new places.

Got stuck in Iraqi oil, Unca Sam?

'Let's call him lucky!'

"No. Bad dog. You may not use fracking to extract a bone you buried."

Libyan Crude Oil

US Energy Needs.

"Now I'm just cleaning up."

"Come to think of it, I can't think of the last time I saw a monarch around here."

Snake in the grass...

"To join OPEC you must be a country and filthy rich in oil."

"Mr. Bush, this is Vytautas Landsbergis, in Vilnius. Guess what."

'No way! To fund health, education and welfare, we'd be forced to tax oil companies!'

"It really was a no-brainer, selling drilling rights at the North Pole."

"Yeah, OK! You surrender. We get it. That's great. Now who's in charge around here? Hello? Yoo-hoo."

Car Breast-Feeding

Ethanol and foreign oil.

National Oil Reserve (Formerly National Wildlife Reserve).

Take me to your leader. . .

'Well number 34 has run dry and is now pumping fossils.'

'I don't care if you are the CEO of a large oil company, you can't claim your soul as a business loss.'

'I'm trying to turn gold into gasoline.'

Keystone XL

BP Waiter: Dinner is served!

Terrorism premium on every barrel of oil.

Acme Petroleum, since 1925 and 9/10.

Army Man Playset 2020

Energy trap.