Office Whisperer Gifts

'I've been meaning to have someone look at that chair.'

'I think our filing system is a little too obvious.'

'Plan A and B involve you taking the fall for me.'

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

'I hear he'd drive over just about ANYBODY to get ahead in the world!'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

You are the epicenter of the office gossip.

"Yeah. The new office is good. Not the most private though."

"Don't tell people how to do things, tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results."

"Tell the employees that from now I want them to do as I say, not as I do."

'I understand yours is a highly coveted position in this company.'

I overheard management saying they were kicking you but I didn't hear if it was upstairs or out.

'What did you learn in the board meeting? The boss reads lips.'

"Run it by the legal department—but don't let them see you."

'We give bonuses only to people who won't tell that they got one.'

It's not forever......

'See that letter from Jones and Company? Nicely typed.' - 'Good grammar too.'

'I know you did your level best, Henderson -- the trouble is, your level best is lopsided!'

"I'm really great thanks. The boss loves my ideas, he says I'm ahead of my time!" "Hi John, how are you? Good meeting?"

Office gossip

"Love your feng shui!"

Compression

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

'What do you mean...You feel uncomfortable asking for time off?'

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

Fixing the Computer.

Phil would get giddy after a large print run, but the company was saving a fortune.

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

"It's not who you know, it's how you use them."

That endless instant between initial eye contact and conscious recognition.

Computer help.

"Matt, you look like you just saw a ghost who fired you!"

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

"On Monday, they will introduce a new office layout and you'll be near Judy, who isn't good at sharing her charger. . ."