Office Settings Gifts

'Here's where you'll work! I know it's confusing, however we will have paid training for you.'

Senior Management Slacker

'I'm going to have to let you go.'

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

21st century water cooler conversations.

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

Boss's Desk Says No!

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

"He's not really much of a leader...he just has a lot of followers."

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.

"Rolled-up sleeves, no coat, loose tie...it's my casual confrontational look."

'I'm promoting you to project coordinator because you seem to have an overall view of things.'

"The new chairman has dropped the brain-storming meetings."

The best financial decision I ever made.

'These are job perks.'

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

"In the old days, we had to constantly feed the screensaver."

Lemonade Inc.

In many ways this is the perfect job! Out. Out.

"I bet you're curious about what's going on in the R&D Department."

"It used to Casual Friday. Now it's Furlough Friday."

"At this office no two days are different."

'Office Woofers. For the quiet and obnoxious boss.'

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."