Office Pecking Order Observer Pillows

"That arrow always goes to the bottom when I walk by."

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"This position has become very important to the company."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"We're looking for that perfect blend of vision, ambition and ethical ambiguity."

"Serendipity is not a strategy."

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

"That one shows our office cliques."

He used to pass the buck, since being promoted to management he gets to call it delegating authority.

'Chicken Farms - Pecking Order'

Terry had a computer bug.

'I'm looking for an assistant who knows my job, can do my job, but has no interest in having my job.'

'I miss telling people they can't have a day off to be with their sick children!'

"Maybe our beloved founder is trying to tell us something."

"When everyone's an 800 pound gorilla, nobody's an 800 pound gorilla.".

"Goodbye, Cruikshank. We leave you to contemplate the wisdom of messing with big dog!"

'You may feel lost and insignificant at first working for us.'

"What we need in this organisation is more personal contact."

'How dare they make these kind of suggestions?!'

You're right, boss, there may be too much idle chit-chat, but let me talk it over with my friends.

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

'My salary increase got a few oo-hs.. but no ah-hs..'

'See Dick sleep on job. See Dick get fired.'

"Remember that requirement that you work without supervision? Forget it."

'I suppose it was a blessing. Toward the end he was finding it very difficult to remain competitive.'

'... Further to our telephone conversation of the 3rd, my fax of the 11th, my letters of the 16th, 23rd and 28th, my emails of....'

'...need to design something to bridge the generation gap.'

You are here.

London merchant telling a young employee that if he does not change his behaviour his career will go badly and he may end up becoming mayor

'Put simply, we need our website to tell consumers all about our company without really telling them anything about our company,'

How many workers does it take to put up a Christmas decoration?

Their bubble-boss seemed completely unaware of the toxic work environment.

In case of panic, push button.

Jenkins! Why is it everything in this office is voice-activated except you?