Office Peacemaker Gifts

Conflict resolution in the workplace.

"Well, so far I'm managing to stay above the fray."

'I find it's best to just stay out of office politics.'

"My main job is keeping these two apart."

'On your way out could you ask my receptionist to bring in the Peters file? She isn't talking to me today.'

Quieting Dissent: Method #5

"Teams work better when members don't call each other a 'useless waste of skin'."

"We need to work on our people-friendly image you jackass."

"That's what I like about you Smedley - you're not afraid to show fear!"

"This is a family business. She won't order you to do something. She'll nag you."

"Yes, we are experiencing some employee relations issues."

Business Conflicts

STRIP *Community Care * Office rage"

'I think we have to move away from this Blame Culture.'

'Mr Evans, I think we'd better reconsider our no-smoking policy.'

"Granberry, you're about to suffer a near-death experience!"

"Calm down,everyone! Almost nobody wants a shoving match."

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

'Please make us instruments of Thy peace, starting with Bucky Sims.'

"What colour do you have to get before the big kids leave you alone?"

"I know we've had our differences in the past but if you scratch behind my ears I'll show you where the catnip is kept."

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

HR - Helping Relationships

Self-Help Books Families for Lockdown

'This rift between you and Dr. Voight has become a chasm.'

Noise Pollution

'King Solomon had seven hundred wives, Ed, and you just have the one. Surely you can work out your differences.'

"Hey, you guys, don't you remember? The big word here is 'compromise.' "

Right-thinking people against wrong-thinking people

"Why can't you ever relax at parties?"

'Do you want to reschedule? Normally he has a magnetic personality, but today he seems to have reversed polarity.'

"Go ask your mother ... and I'll tell you why she's wrong."

'This isn't Armageddon... it's a bar brawl on a Saturday night. Let Pestilence read the map.'

"God help us, it's that guy."

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."