Office Culture Explorer Gifts

'F.Y.I., it's called a treadmill workstation, not a stationary rat race.'

'Callers will be answered in the order of their Fortune 500 ranking.'

'Nice power tie, J.B.'

Elevators, one with people upside down in it.

"I found out my staff have a nickname for me, I'm not sure it's a good idea!"

"Oh my, 'failure' is such a strong word. I prefer 'terminally reduced expectations'."

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"Staff support"

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

21st century water cooler conversations.

Boss's Desk Says No!

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

"He's not really much of a leader...he just has a lot of followers."

"Rolled-up sleeves, no coat, loose tie...it's my casual confrontational look."

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

"The new chairman has dropped the brain-storming meetings."

'I'm promoting you to project coordinator because you seem to have an overall view of things.'

The best financial decision I ever made.

"On the plus side, I finally have a key to the executive washroom."

"At this office no two days are different."

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

"It used to Casual Friday. Now it's Furlough Friday."

"In the old days, we had to constantly feed the screensaver."

'These are job perks.'

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

'The portrait is a mark of his extreme egotism, but, if you curtsy and bow sufficiently...say, 'Oh Yes Sir!'!, to everything he says, you should do OK'

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

'Believe me, I know transformation isn't easy. I pulled a muscle once.'

"Would anyone like to question my downsizing proposal?"