Offbeat Entertainer Gifts

Off Off Off Off Broadway

Dinner at the Trapdoors

"Extreme miming"

A rabbit giving another rabbit, 'rabbit ears'.

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

“What if I tell you the card you are thinking of is … the Jack of Hearts ?”

'Don't you ever knock?'

'Sorry...you're not quite right for the position.'

Man playing a harmonica on a exercise bike bores customers in a restaurant

'Yes, yes, Rupert, you are still a mighty hunter. Now, please bring the turkey back to Luisa in the kitchen.'

'It's a new reality show about a reality show producer...'

Forcing the Rabbit to Eat the Magicians Hat.

"Would you like to buy a commemorative photo of your firing?"

Sinlge-white-male seeking single-female who enjoys, silence, long long walks, and scorpions.

"Okay. So, apart from being a very shy ventriloquist, is there anything else you can tell me about him?"

Tom Waits.

"Thanks, you've been a great audience. I'm Jerry and I'm here all week."

"I don't get it. Who doesn't love a circus?"

A cocktail in a tuba

"Would you like to see my one-woman show about the specials?"

Pollution Free Cocktail Cabinet

'You need to slow down - use more color.'

Monk Parrot.

'Now THERE'S a friendship I've never quite understood. That's Ludwig van Beethoven on the left, with Harvey Fernquist, the inventor of telephone 'hold' music!'

Yearbook photos from Miss Bubble's Hair Styling School.

Ventriloquists dummy

"I don't think air guitar counts."

Hospital bed shortages

'What do you mean there's no specific rule that forbids a center fielder from doing that?'

"We outsourced our joyless TV dinners to a delightful couple from next door."

The Imperfect Hostess

'When the alarm clock went off this morning, he said 'I'll drink to that.''

"He's always had a fascination with the hard drinking,hard living writer,the tortured genius. It's an image he's tried to emulate. Unfortunately he's only ever managed the first two parts." "I can't <hic> feel my face."

Alien