Ocean Joker Pillows

Jester.

'This seashell does not sound like the ocean... It sounds like someone yelling 'Look out!''

Man with fake shark fin hat encounters shark with fake human legs.

"You are hereby sentenced to one year of swimming with the people."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

'Bad news, sir -- there's a leak in our think tank!'

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."

"Your mother called to remind you to diversify."

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

"To make this interview more entertaining I would like you to take a breath of helium before answering the questions."

'Please leave the light on, dear. I'm afraid there might be OSHA inspectors under the bed.' 'Managers at Night.'

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

"And best of all, it comes fully loaded!"

'Before we start, shall we go round the table, and each share our name and a horrible dark secret from our past.'

'What's the smallest budget you can manage on?' 'The most you can give me!'

"This resumé has the kind of sizzle we're looking for."

'Careful, that's where the boss keeps his ego.'

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

"In my old job we were encouraged to run fast and break things."

"Call security, Miss Rightman. I have an overwhelming urge to throw good money after bad"

'You're off the plane, Hal. Put the laptop on your desk.'

Of course I always start off by wooing a prospective candidate with talk of stimulating work,great colleagues and a reasonable work life balance...but the winning argument is always when I promise them enough money to choke a rhino.

Check zombies.

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

'Not exactly what I meant by job creation.'

'Stop emailing me, I am standing right here.'

'A 10M bonus for your thoughts.'

"At First Infidelity we're all about integrity...."

Swimming Prankster