Occupational Health Advisor Gifts

CAUTION (sign tripped over)

Businessman uses yoga moves while reviewing financial news on computer

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

"Well, all the symptoms of just another typical case of burnout, I'm afraid."

"I suppose you want the rest of the day off!"

Time Out For Teddy

The Dangers of National Safety Week.

'No days off, no paid overtime, no benefits...this job is killing me!'

'Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to our new 'health and safety' officer.'

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

The Hive, Inc. Think safety! 17 days without a honey boo-boo.

Govt. UK led by Seance

'The Meaning of Life? -- you don't have a bad ticker, do you?'

Urine Catcher

'Many of our employees are under a lot of pressure. This keeps them from getting the bends if they begin to unwind too quickly.' (Decompression chamber)

'It's a brand new state-of-the-art waiting room.'

'I'm sorry Bill, but some things in medicine we doctors just can't explain...like insurance forms.'

"My sensitivity trainer says I have to say 'good morning.'"

"They never told us what carrying twenty times our own weight would do to our knees."

'I hear they've named a new stress syndrome after me.'

"Well, Mr Eagle, coming to see me is the first positive step to get you to soar again..."

'What does carpal tunnel syndrome feel like?'

'OK, what's the first thing we need to capture in our Job Safety Analysis?' 'Don't tick off TINY!'

'But boss, this will keep my muscles from getting fatiqued.'

Jim's Smart Kettle

"Have you ever worked in a noisy environment, and suffered hearing loss as a result?"

Food Pyramid.

'You're right, Haskell, I should get more exercise. Tomorrow I'm turning your office into a gym.'

"I'm recommending a more balanced diet."

'Test results are back. Coffee, donuts, sleep deprivation. Doc, you've got to start taking better care of yourself.'

Safety meeting.

"Now they're saying shiny things attached to hooks are bad for you."

My fitness tracker said I was dead but I thought I'd better get a second opinion

Safety last.