Occasional Drinker Pillows

I'd suggest less drinking, less smoking and less watching Paris Hilton on TV as good New Years' resolutions.

"If I'd known they had so little to drink I'd have brought the car."

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

A cat pours himself a gin and tonic.

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

"I know my drinking limits.The problem is that I can never reach them - I simply fall down."

"Another flue shot, Larry.

The Reaper's Arms

"Honestly, Paula, I don't know what I'd do without our daily keggers."

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

'Beer's more than just a food -- it's a comfort food!'

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

'The King of what?'

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

"So, Danny Boy, what's up in your world?"

"Scientists may need a trillion dollar atom smasher to explore the fundamental questions of the universe, but all you need is one too many."

Is your glass half full or half empty? Who cares, fill her up!

"I opened the last of the emergency wine."

"You're looking a bit RUFF this morning."

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

"Hard day at the office Dear? You're swigging the Balsamic Vinegar."

Whiskey wars

'Brand X, the wine for those with indiscriminate taste.'

'The first cocktail.'

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis.

Wine at the Bar

Rabbit Punch

"Sad but true - my career ladder turned out to be a career footstool."