Obedience Expert Gifts

"Does he need to be healed or heeled?"

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

"We've found a marvelous trainer for Rex."

Agility God

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

Marv was trying to teach Rufus how to be a REAL retriever.

Dog Training Academy and the Cat Anarchy Club.

Zombie pet tricks.

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

"Penny's still having issues grasping 'icing the puck,' but she nailed 'offsides' and 'too many men' today!"

Jump Boy!God, your life must be dull.

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

'He's never going to graduate. How about giving him an honorary degree instead?'

'Mac, I told you last week a collar and a tag aren't enough - there's a leash law in this town.'

"Let's try 'roll over.' We can come back to this."

Dog Training.

'I'm tired of sitting and staying.'

"Yeah, I've put on a lot of weight, but my master's favourite command is "sit, sit, sit!" I barely ever get to exercise..."

'I want a dog who will fetch my things, so don't sell me one that drools.'

Welcome to pet obedience school. We're going to have fun and get these darlings into shape. Obey-Wan-Ken

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

'That beagle sure is a tough case!'

"Oh, no, no, no, no! Please, NOOO!"

'Going to Puppy School is so old fashioned Dad: I can do the course through open learning now...'

"Sorry honey, I'll be late. The boss told me to stay."

"Text!"

"What, again? You've gotta be kidding me!"

'We're not interested in loyalty,but we do value obedience.'

"Not until you fetch the other one."