Ob-gyn Gifts

'Life was moving along at a nice, steady pace, then I hit middle age and my life hot-flashed before my eyes!'

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

"... No, it's not true that you can't eat anything after surgery - you can have lots of choices, like ice chips in a cup, ice chips in a bowl, ice chips a la ice..."

'Grandma, does the hospital charge by the pound when people have babies?'

'Do you deliver?'

"Honey, it's the ob-gyn. Do you want to know if it's mine or not?"

"Who says nothing good is made in America anymore?"

"I can exercise as long as I avoid becoming light headed, flush, or short of breath. Of course, if I could have avoided those symptoms a few months ago I wouldn't be pregnant in the first place."

'Mommy, does 'GYN' stand for Grow Your Navel.'

Next gen pregnancy tests.

'No! I'm doctor Fred Soifer, the veterinarian. You want Doctor Harild Soider, the OB-GYN across the street."

'How far along are you?'

A maternity ward throughout the year and at Christmas.

Businesswoman Empowerment

Butterfly Woman

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

Profit

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

"His first out-of-body experience."

"We've made great progress!"

'You see, Brad, I'm not just a highly polished career woman.'

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

"Helen brings home our second, third and fourth incomes."

Looks like another day in which. . . I have to run the world, the country, the business and the household!!!

International Women's Day.

"Women Supporting Women!"

The cell phone soother for life.

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

"I only travelled with my umbilical cord!"

A midwife holding a baby

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

"I've just never worked anyplace where the 'alpha male' was a woman."

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

Take the time to do something nice for yourself. Your kids will thank you. That is, if you ever decide to have them.