Nutrition Guideline Followers Gifts

"It's empty because the health department banned everything inside the box."

All Natural Nothing

Dog Crossing

Dog tries to obey No Dog sign

'That's our corporate ladder.'

"Turn off cell phones violators will be over ruled."

"I AM following doctor's orders. He told me to cut back to one cup a day...right?!"

"I assume you're on the paleo diet."

American Bombs

Office computer: 'Thank you for not using me for personal business.'

'Here are the safety manuals you wanted'

'Bad news! More people are switching from red meat to fish!'

Speeding Forklift

"Until you're top management, Warrick, I strongly suggest you stay within the lines."

"The deadline for compliance just kicked in."

Woman leaves a stick of dynamite on her weighing scales and runs away

She didn't know when her baby climbed onto the prize pile, but she could never turn her back on the international Carny code of law.

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'

'It's from the Federal Trade Commission -- we have to put in a non-smoking section.'

'Great news, Mr President You've been nominated for the Nobel War Prize'

An Arm and a Leg.

'According to Dr Alvin McDowell, everything that was good for you is now bad for you!'

'... And as soon as it's discovered, don't play with fire!'

Business man must jump through hoops to impress his boss.

Angel with speed camera.

'...so until you get your own place - you live by our rules!'

'I'm sorry, Sally, you can't buy a vowel.'

"Poppa, can you read me the Riot Act again?"

'Now you tell me you've gone vegan?'

"Oh-now I see where we part company. You are cleaving unto the spirit of the law, while I am cleaving to the letter of the law!"

"Do you mind? I'm reading the prospectus carefully before investing."

'He had it coming to him - he didn't follow government guidelines.'

"You were doing the speed limit. I found that suspicious."