Nutrition Fan Gifts

One of several sugar maple trees is labled sugar free.

'I'm on this 3 month diet...it only lasts a week, but it feels like 3 months.'

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

'We've only got a couple of days to finish this box of cereal. Mom'll never let us eat something called energy-packed after school's out.'

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

'Let me at it! Let me see!!'

"Only 35% CACAO? I'll have to eat TWICE as much then!"

"I'm not sure what's causing your stomachache. But I think it's safe to rule out hunger pains."

'Who cares about content? With a title like this it'll sell millions!'

Attack of the 'health' foods

'Frank, leak to the tabloids that these slow moving broccoli flakes cure cancer.'

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

"Young man, the world is your oyster, but for God�s sake avoid peanuts, soy, milk, eggs, wheat, fish, tree nuts, and chocolate."

Friendly bacteria

I assure you the animals didn't suffer. All of our meat comes from animals who died naturally of old age while vacationing in Miami.

"Looks like someone forget her lunch today."

'I could have had a V-8!'

'According to Dr Alvin McDowell, everything that was good for you is now bad for you!'

Aiiiii! Fat! Cholesterol! Food!

'It's getting harder every day to make a living at this.'

Texas Dashboard Organizer

Vending machines: Caffeine, Sugar and Carbs.

Football fans in corona times

"It may not be the lowest cal, but it's low enough cal for me."

"It appears your high sodium bacon is playing havoc with your blood pressure."

"I find if I say we're having hashtag broccoli or hastag brussel sprouts, they are more apt to eat them."

'VEGETARIAN ZOMBIES' colour

The real reason salad aids weight loss

'Let me introduce my biggest supporter, a real whale of a guy, a huge fan..'

'If you haven't been taking your vitamins. What have you been doing with them?'

'Hello - is that Jamie Oliver?'

'You should give her a bigger breakfast - She's just eaten my thermometer!'

Food Pyramid.