Nursery Rhyme Lovers Gifts

'Visualize yourself not falling off the wall.'

'She went on the pill.'

Cow History: July 20, 1969

'How many times have I asked you not to bring bread and honey into the counting house!'

The fact is, the peck of pickled peppers you, Peter Piper, picked was on private property! Allitigation.

'We now have a suspect in the shocking knife attack on the tails of three sight impaired victims. However, the only thing police know about her at this point is that she's married to a farmer.'

The Cat that Ate the Canary, 3 a.m.

'We can pay you, or we can give you healthcare coverage, but we can't do both.'

After being frightened away too many times, Miss Muffett decided to rif herself of the spider.

'We're out of blackbirds -- how about four-and-twenty hamburgers?'

The Obamaficaton of NASA.

...And that was all for Pinocchio.

"Oh, this isn't our primary home. Just an off-season time share."

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

CSI: Mother Goose Unit...'Hmmm...I'm beginning to suspect that perhaps mister Dumpty's demise wasn't simply a tragic accident.'

'Are you made of sugar?'

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

Baby's first thought...Daddy's a moron.

Cow jumping over the moonshine.

"The spoon, he ran away with the goddam spoon."

The Hey Diddle Diddle Orchestra

"You're lost. This is Mom's apple pie."

'I knew things were getting out of hand when I went from snips, to snails, to puppy dogs tails....'

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

"Well, that one got away."

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

'She barely made it out of the atmosphere... next!'

'Listen up, Baskerville! This is MacDonald! Those hounds of yours are scaring the E-I-E-I-O out of my animals!'

"A whack, whack here. A whack, whack there. Here a whack, there a whack. Everywhere a whack, whack."

Old Lady in shoe driving a footie (sock) car.

"So, when he says, 'What a good boy am I,' Jack is really reinforcing his self-esteem."

Humpty Dumpty goes bungee jumping.