Number Artist Pillows

"My job is in finance. This is just my hobby."

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

Today we learned to count to one.

'1,2,3 4,5,6 7,8,9...'It's the little things that count.(little figurines counting).

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

"As near as I can figure, we're in the Unpainted Desert!"

Scientist counting microscopic things he can see in his microscope

"Arithmetic gets a lot harder when you run out of fingers and toes."

'There are lies, damn lies, and statistics. We're looking for someone who can make all three of these work for us.'

"Six out of ten statisticians prefer to be in the majority."

"My accountant is brilliant - he has just had a loophole names after him!"

'According to our fact finding committee, our stock won't be worth a dime this quarter.'

Staff Yearbook

Math Teacher

But under a different accounting convention ...

'In this class you will learn to apply the talents of creative writing to accounting.'

"When you're nailing the numbers, they don't ask questions."

Sister to brother: 'It's kind of like alphabet soup, only for numbers crunchers.'

Warning: Math Ahead!

Man rotates profit chart so it shows growth not loss.

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'

'And that's with massaging the numbers!'

'But if you need someone for the intangibles...'

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

"We're estimating that sales are now up to about here."

Pi fight!

Reign Man

"Now the board will hear from Todd from Accounting with his free verse composition 'My Mistress, Brash and Beguiling – the Third Quarter Numbers.'"

"Oh, that three billion dollars."