Novelty Footwear Lover Pillows

You're right - flip-flops and cloven hooves just don't work.

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

Shoe addict.

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

Family heirlooms that will never make it onto the mantelpiece.

Podiatry. The greated podiatrist of all time, you say? Yep. I studied at his feet.

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

"I know it's tough to get motivated on Mondays, but..."

"Dear, you are Definitely coming back as a centipede."

'Best to keep downwind.'

Running shoes? You have the wrong idea about "fasting," Brother Ernest!

Daniel Day Lewis & George Glasgow

"Doctor Scholl and Mr. Hyde."

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

"Nothing is ever in my size either."

Mischievous Pets

Chocolaterie Don Giovanni - Chocolate Footwear.

"Leftovers"

Drinking Hats

"These are the least elegant one's in stock!"

"Psst. . . fancy shoe sales are down. Can you make Crocs instead?"

"I know they're expensive, Evelyn, but like the saying goes...If the Jimmy Choos fit, wear them!"

Arr...Italian it be.

The edge on this blade gives a close shave. Guaranteed to last a lifetime.

"Oh my Gosh...I nearly sheeped my pants."

'You are here' T-shirt,

One size fits all

At the party, nobody like the fruitcake.

"As I told you before, I do not allow smoking in my restaurant..."

"Keep the holiday beard, by all means, but please lose the hat."

"You must be the new guy!"

"You didn't specify which slippers, so I brought the L.L. Bean and UGG. Also, Mittens here made you an old-fashioned."

'I'll be honest it has a few flaws...'