Novelty Family Kit T-Shirts

'You're the mother and those are your children? -- I'd like to see a DNA test.'

Dog Walking Services

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

'You're a genius, Hoppy!'

Advocado

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

Hay Rides $10

Cash Machines From Across the Land

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

Peel poker.

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

"Well - I've either bought a pack of table napkins, or adopted a Siberian tiger cub..."

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

LOL. Larry Lee Oppenheimer is no fan of monogrammed underwear.

"Yes, we’d like to buy a grow house." "Chia Pet’s first purchase."

Elton John

Family heirlooms that will never make it onto the mantelpiece.

'I need it for my electric blanket.'

Ball Pool Peril

Inflatable Hands with Index and Middle fingers showing on sale for spectators at a Sports Stadium Event

Barry gradually realised that buying a small car had its disadvantages

'Celeb Foods: Damien Hurst's voles in brine.'

Leaking backpack.

GARDU VIN! (BEWARE!). Clown sees several pies to beware of.

Bumper Limos

"Krazy straw"

Thank you for calling ace novelty..and remember, think outside the box!

"Rats! It doesn't work...but why?? Why??!!"

Businessman with novelty in and out baskets.