Novelty Eyewear Collector Pillows

'I'll need you to wear these novelty glasses, Scott. Nobody's going to let you watch over their money with those beady little eyes.'

Clown on bike.

Fish, singing: 'I'm a sole man..'

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

"Yes, I said bring me the king. . .But not that king."

These species are only living off the coast of Southern California!

"Recalculating route..."

Hay Rides $10

'Rollin', rollin', rollin',...keep them dogies rollin'...'

Fossil record player.

'They might look sexy and seductive but all I want to do is the crossword.'

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

When you said the cat was hacking down here, I assumed you meant a hairball.

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

A crab with a utility knife claw

"I went with weirdness over quantity this year."

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

Lavatory Waterfall

'Each one is signed and numbered.'

Rogue elephant

"But I've seen a million wind-up monkeys. Wait! Did you say it bangs on a snare drum?"

'This thing better hold. I don't know about you, but I don't find plan B very reassuring.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

'These new metal detectors are great!'

Inflatable Hands with Index and Middle fingers showing on sale for spectators at a Sports Stadium Event

Who'd have guessed that the season's mast have item would be big springy shoes.

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

See? Those guys on chlorophyll just lie around in the sun all day!

The origin of the Hula Hoop.

'Let there be cool.'

Joke Shop product - Not Funny After 10 Sept 87

Monkey Business

Med School Mascots.