Novel-hunter Pillows

Librarian Watches As Woman Climbs The Bookshelves

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

Thomas Mann.

Nathaniel Hawthorne

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

Television Readers.

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"Do you have any of those books that understand men?"

Raincloud Umbrella

Silence of the Chickens...

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

The First Draft. . . Moby Duck.

'What clan do you belong to?'

Characters jumping out of a book.

Crap from the future.

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

'You're a genius, Hoppy!'

"That's five votes for In The Midst of Winter....three votes for The Hollow Ground....and, again, one vote for Moby-Dick."

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

"I don't care if it is itty-bitty. Turn it off!"

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

Iris Murdoch

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

Useless add-ons.

Trilby - 'The old studio'.

Ant story: 'and so they worked all day and they worked all night and then they worked some more, the end.'

Cash Machines From Across the Land

'Sorry, Frank, I know this is your favourite lake, but I just can't eat fish who smoke cigarettes.'

'The pile of unread books by the bed looks bigger than the futon...'