Note Bender T-Shirts

Eric Clapton.

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'Hey! Hey! You need a trout stamp! Where's your trout stamp?!'

Alternative fielding positions

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

Baseball pitch with a sign saying 'No Left Turn.'

My other cello is a Stradivari

"Didn't you just say that?"

'Hold it Billy - There are no praying mantises in school.'

"As a member of the Sunday praise team you are not allowed to "change it up", whenever you feel led."

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

"I warned you about putting funny stuff on the ball, Flanagan."

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'

"Sorry, eighty is not the new sixty-five."

Lateral Thinking - Not Out & Not In trays.

'Sorry, Jimmy... our school has a strict 'don't show, don't tell' policy!'

Book store has a book called 'Mind Games,' which is floating magically in the air.

Chaos Theory Lecture - Upstairs and ask again.

Boys Cooking

'I see a beautiful young woman. You're naked, she's leaning over you. Oh, wait. She's performing your autopsy! '

'Interactive TV news.'

'Great! Now we're getting pulled over! I TOLD you that was a lint trap back there, but did you listen? Noooo!'

"Let's just say my teacher and I agreed to disagree."

"Here's a little song I wrote after hearing it on the radio."

"You might call it shoplifting officer, but I prefer to think of it as foraging."

'What? I'm behind the barriers, aren't I?'

Bureau of the Budget. If we serve alphabet soup, we can count it as a lunch program and a literacy program!

"Well, my daddy always says it's not a lie unless the Grand Jury says it's a lie."

Occupational Hazards.

Fun on the pyramids

'But, I'm not fishing. I'm just teaching my pet maggot how to swim.'

'Where in the rules does it say I can't keep a mascot in the goals?'