Nostalgic Tech-averse Gifts

Sell me your souls and I'll make all cell phones and computers go away."

Snoopy with Laptop

'I'm being punished. Nothing even remotely electronic for two weeks.'

'I hope it's fixed soon. I miss the convenience and friendly beep.'

'Oh, relax. Stopping to ask how to use the GPS does not violate the male decree against asking directions.'

'I'm trying to figure out online shopping. I've found some pants I like, but I can't find a fitting room.'

'Apparently the poor love's walkman is broken.'

'Yes, I did put a bigger string on it. It's called upgrading.'

TV Repair 101.

'The key to inner peace? A land line.'

'You've got E.I.E.I.O mail'

"Poor guy..he just got a 'Dear John' fax!"

'You help me with my homework and I'll help you with the timer on the video recorder!'

Email in a bottle.

'We can't put it off any longer, we must book hearing tests.'

'I like getting my news online, but I miss annoying people with excessive, newspaper rustling noises.'

Life before fitness trackers.

'Hello Cynthia, it's me...I thought I'd phone for a natter, Gerald's fallen asleep in front of the TV...trying to program the video.'

"What's a phone book?"

"Grandpa, you remind me a lot of myself in my pre-tech years."

'I think Miss Jones is winning her fight against computerisation, gentlemen!'

"It happens every time we get a new piece of equipment...He won't invest the time to study the instructions and it ends in disaster."

"I really miss letters."

Robot and Radio

'The professor can read hieroglyphics on ruins and in tombs but he can't read text messages on his cell phone.'

'That's a fax machine. The older guys use it to send messages.'

"Our carrier pigeon died. Maybe it was time to update our communication system, anyway."

'I though I'd developed tinnitus, then I remembered we still have a landline.'

Myspace then and now.

"No, it's not a sinkhole. My old computer tower was so big and heavy, I dropped it."

Stressed Office Junior

'I ran a computer check on you. If you'll give me the phone number of that cute babe Diane on your MySpace site, I'll let you off with just a warning.'

Go to meeting, Zoom, remote learning, embeddable video, skypting. . . and you still haven't mastered your VCR.

The victims of technological advances...

'Letters, letters, letters - why can't you learn to text?'