Nostalgic Joker Pillows

'Bloomin Hippies!'

'As a kid, whenever I was at a petting zoo, I got bit, butted and stomped on.'

'I never now what to do in the country.'

Grandpa was proud of the effect his signature stolen nose trick was having on the young crowd. It wasn't until later that anyone explained to him how Dylan had lost his real nose in a horrible sledging accident.

Night of the Latkes

ZZZZZZZ Top

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"

Large print rock'n'roll section

Rock and Roll

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

"Grandpa's not tech savvy. If I want to unfriend someone, I say, 'I don't like you anymore' to their face."

"Maybe we should just let heaven and nature sing."

'Yes I think we did go to school together. Wasn't you the old headmistress?'

"Everytime you touch me, I get frostbite!"

"Out, damn'd Spot, out I say! Ha Ha Ha Ha!"

'Cows have bells because their horns don't work.'

'The most moving part, for me, is when they explain how to fuse the main pipe to the power hose.'

'I'm surprised the boss isn't in here checking up on us!'

Ice-Cube-IV

"A valiant effort, Mike, but just accept that you're going bald."

Keats's heart aches, and a drowsy numbness pains his sense.

Santa Claws...

"Come on guys, my jokes aren't that bad!"

'If you ask me, toys are getting far too realistic!'

"Right before I die I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels."

'You again? OK, pal... I'm deleting you and this time you're going to stay deleted!' ~ the screen saver of Dorian Gray.

"He claims to be self aware but he clearly can't read a room."

'Good book?'

"First of all, this conversation never happened."

Skywriter's Block

'He's making preparations for his elderly care.'

'It's self cleaning, and runs on natural gas.'

'Two, four, six, eight Who do we appreciate ,,,'

The Cartoonists

"The kids told me it was a magic wand."