Unconventional Joker Pillows

"Right before I die I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels."

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

'You know too much,'

Good News about winter

Fish hunting for men.

Candid Camera store.

'I love cutting trees in perfect circles because it drives aerial photography interpreters crazy.'

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

'My door is always open. That's why I installed a tripwire.'

Beware of Falling Notice.

'Mind taking off your scarf.'

'Look, Dad, I made a pair of boots out of your chest waders.'

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

'Your teacher doesn't mind a little clowning around in class, Eddie, but she thinks you overdo it.'

"Okay, you scared the babysitter...now get back in there and rinse off that toothpaste, and go to bed!"

Caution May Contain Nuts.

Shoes Make The Man

While You Were Out: We Moved!

'Dearly beloved.....and the rest of you.....'

Finally there is the right product for real men!"

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

"I keep having these funny moods, doctor."

"It appears your anus transplant has rejected you..."

' I hit two good balls today - when I stepped on that rake.'

Sharks hate practical jokes.

'It's my spare tire. Why do you ask?'

"Uh-oh. We better stop using the fax machine."

"Well, you said your glasses needed cleaning!"

'I tell them it's for a patient in the next room and they don't complain about their shot.'

'You're not being fired Jenkins. It's just that all our colleagues have booted you out of the company.'

"I'm away from my desk or on another line. Please leave a message at the sound of my impersonation of a beep."

"Okay, haha, very funny, you guys. Now toss down the ladder."