Norm Challenger Gifts

A man without a chicken on his head!

The Mainstream

"Grandma, this is now how some schools say obey the rules."

'You don't have to be a boring bastard to work here but it helps.'

Do not think outside the box!

I'm not substitute teaching after all. How come? They wanted a criminal background check! I was a principal for 15 years. They know me! Yes, but

"I'm looking for loopholes."

AI

'The cannon will go off every 20 minutes just to make sure you're paying attention,'

"Cheer up, might never happen!"

'This is a coffee break, Caldwell -- Get rid of that damn teapot!'

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

Victorian woman at a bar.

When a nanosecond is forever.

"It's very sensitive of you to realize that men like to get flowers!"

"I am worthy of human kindness and care. I am worthy of human love and respect. I am worthy of huma rights and equality....or death to the f**king lot of 'em."

'If you don't plan on snacking in between meals, then why did move the fridge in here?'

It says, "In lieu of gifts, please consider a donation to the automaker of your choice." Invite!

'Sorry...I don't do hugs!'

A Woman Asking The Father's Permission To Marry His Son.

'-and stop saying 'who's carrying who over the threshold?''

What If?

'The effects of aging are inevitable. Either accept it, or inject it.'

'Excuse me, ma'am. Pets aren't allowed in the store.'

Do not abuse the Lawn

"Shall I be mother?"

"Mom, Dad, am I adopted?"

The Dance Circa 1970

'No, man, I don't know where you're coming from. But if I had to guess, I'd say the early Seventies.'

Warning.

'Just who the heck are you to decide who's naughty or nice? Quit trying to impose your ideas of morality on everyone else!!'

"Excuse me, but where exactly are we being led?"

"You've had to be kind to survive, and I've had to be nasty."

"The school rule of 'No cellphones in class' does not impinge on you free speech, Kevin."

"No you weren't disturbing us, we were just having sex."