Nonprofit Aficionado Gifts

Beggar holds sign: '.Org since 1961'

Opportunities in Coronatimes

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"We must rise up and claim our rightful place at the table of society! We must never rest until we are given the respect and dignity we deserve! Chica power!"

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

Charities should investigate whether published reports are 'Misleadingly Positive'.

'I tried to warn him - garbage in, garbage out.'

Achiever: An illustration of how many thoughts she can have in a split second, while still listening to him.

'Tommy's doing fine. I'm concerned about your poor fund-raising record. You sold only two magazine subscriptions and one measly candy bar.'

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

"It's touching, actually, to see white dudes fumble around for a few last moments in the spotlight."

Monday around 9PM.

'I was dumped by my girlfriend.'

We Used to Build Things

More people working in Voluntary sector than 2010.

Lincoln v. Douglas - 2020

"Queen begins with Q, it should be precisely here."

'Right, moving on to the housekeeping...'

'Sorry, free parking for big campaign contributors only'

The nonprofit dog fight.

'What a control freak!'

"Our first order of business will be the new speed bump in the parking lot."

'For donating half my property to the poor, I'll get the 'Unselfish Millionaire of the Year' medal and a supporting receipt for my allowable expenses!'

'Nobody's leaving till I get the offering plate back!'

"What are we doing wrong?"

"Talk about old New York families—they bought their Warhols new!"

'I'm freezing...The rich list is a little thin this year.'

Desk bins: Pretend it's not here, Hope it goes away, Delegate it.

"My company sells military goods and information to unsavory characters around the world, and donates 100% of our profits to local charities!"

"I got my first paycheck, and now I understand why our organization is classified as a nonprofit."

'I'd feel better spending all my money here if you were a registered charity.'

"The biggest downside of funding IT startups... is being called 'dude'!"

'Your very generous charitable contribution shows up as this very slight blip right here.'