Noise-hating Ninja Gifts

"Would passengers sitting in the Quiet Zone please...Shut the F**K UP!"

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

Nervous Oral Testing

That party went well.

'I'd like to return this, please.'

Piano Keyboard

Martial Arts

Mega Cosmic Films. It's about a squad of ninja nuns? Yes, we call it "Force of Habit"!

Book Thief in True Crime Department

Fenton always makes a backup hard copy of his mental notes.

'Memorable miracles' from 'burning bush' to 'low cal ice cream'

"Building a ninja-attracting business culture is easy. Keeping them focused on equity-based financial analysis? Not so easy."

Flute-a-licious.

Confucius say: shut up.

Ninja.

"Better than Chekhov"

'She wasn't a soccer mom after all -- she was a NINJA mom!'

man in suit carries pile of books with sticky notes

"Your book is a masterpiece, but, unfortunately, we're rather picky."

"A ninja is silent as darkness, so-tippy-toes, people, tippy-toes!"

'I wouldn't do that if I were you, mister. This saloon is made entirely of ninjas.'

Because bubble wrap made it hard to sneak up on their targets, ninjas eventually switched to their familiar black outfits.

Body Language - Hiss!

Be the grass...

"We're looking for fresh, exciting, independent voices which are very similar to those of our existing bestsellers."

Oh, don't worry about my husband — he's out of town on his silly ninja business.

'I've decided to narrate my own like in the third person today', he said - 'Oh, God. Not this again', she uttered plaintively. - 'Shut. Up.', she bellowed threatiningly at the fleeing man.

Ninja Rule no#1: never wear corduroy.

"I bet you're glad you got out of politics to spend more time with your family."

Ninja Mom: 'Boys if you cant say something with a sword, don't say anything.'

Ninja

'My ballet training comes in handy when I don't want the baby to wake up.'

Information War

Must... Remember...