Nine-to-fiver Gifts

'We're TRYING to find you a job, but you fall into that difficult 18 to 65 age group!'

'When are you going to give up this 9 to 5 nonsense and become a rock star like your brother?'

'What a day...it was just one hour after the next...'

"Must be 5 o'clock, eh?"

Office slaves.

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

Work Slave

I hate Mondays and now I'm developing an aversion to Tuesdays!

'Anderson! On this team we slap hands or slap fannies after someone scores a run. We do not slap faces.'

"Every day is Monday." "Except Friday."

"If you're wondering why you've been chosen 'Employee of the week,' it's because your work load is about to increase, while your pay remains the same."

"Honey! We're home!"

Job complaints on road signs.

"I have a very demanding job. The boss is always demanding I work late."

"Want to go watch the people who get to leave at a normal hour?"

"What next?" "Don't tell me."

'I wanted shorter hours, so he cut my breaks.'

Thinking outside the box.

'Well it's about time! My belly needs scratching.'

'Enjoy the race race, dear.'

'Why do you need an alarm clock'

"He's here early and he stays late. I don't know if he's dedicated or just homeless."

The week at a glance.

'I'm sorry I didn't come to work yesterday, sir -- somehow, it seemed like Sunday.'

Stop the world. I want to get off again.

"Nothing ruins a Friday more than waking up and realizing it's only Thursday."

'One moment, please.'

"Will it be necessary to wake the others?"

Crayons - Expiration Date: Your 9th Birthday.

"You're married to your job, but it's time for a divorce."

Monday Morning at 9:02 am

Caution: High-five area.

'How come your hard days at the office are harder than anyone else's hard days at the office.'

"I'll have what everyone else is having."

'The good thing about the outside is that it's always open!'