Nightclub Navigator T-Shirts

'That's the last time I go there - Bagpipes and Karaoke just don't mix!'

I could have danced all night!

Jazz quartet, piano, bass, sax and drums

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

'This is your idea of hitting the local hotspots?'

'The guy at the end of the bar, would like to know if he can get you to buy him another drink?'

'The landscape is continually shifting Son, so you have to learn to navigate by the Sun and the stars...'

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

Punctuation Karaoke Night

Space hopper as a bouncer of a nightclub

'Mmm … and he's ringing wet too. I just can't resist the smell of a wet dog.'

A Sandbar piles of sand in a bar enjoying their night out

'I can't sleep. I'm too awake.'

melting snowman in a bar, one for the road

'Are you ready to be patronised yet?'

"I don't know 'where I've been all of your life', but wherever it was, I wish I was there now!"

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

"The next song is for all you unreconstructed commies, who are still in love with their tractors."

'Turn right at the Robinia pseudoacacia, pass the garden with the salvia officinalis, cross the road when you see the stranvaesia davidinia and the pub is on the left!'

'The gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you an aphrodisiac.'

Cocktail Piano Bar.

'Oh, no! The monster under my bed is my brother!'

'Just one more and this puppy is headed for another bar.'

'That guy is SO tacky.'

Club DJ.

Club insecurity.

"They must be having a two-for-one promotion tonight."

"I love college."

'Have a couple of dreams, and call me in the morning.'

Amusing patients: Photocopier burns

Joe's Bar, Under New Joe!

Animals looking at a map of the crops on a farm.

"It's a jolly drinking song but I can't make it past the first few bars."

"Shaken."