Niece Or Nephew Gifts

'It's for cutting and pasting.'

"Well....y'know, like, Julian, like well he's sooo into, like, Mandy, like, well, like, and she put on, like, facebook, like, and twitter, like, y'know, like, how much, like, she loves Hugo..."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"Young Frankenstein"

Robot Parts $5

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

"Being raised in the city, Fred didn’t quite grasp the true purpose of a game camera."

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Bond James, Bond."

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

Prize vegetables.

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Skipping Horse

I should be a writer when I grow up...

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Remote control pirate bully