Newspaper Recycler Gifts

Why would birdie need newspaper?

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

"It's me. I'm calling in sick of it."

Reading the sports pages.

"The car is in the garage, but I had to drive over the lawnmower."

Rhinoceros Is Most Intelligent Ungulate

"Well, I think we come back as newspapers." "You're nuts."

Tree Funeral

Cleaner dusting under man's toupee.

Bird in a chair with a human in a cage.

'No, I am not finished with the comics section, now give me back my glasses!'

"Percy Shattock, Page Three Girls...1979 to 1986."

"This is the way I like it - I pretend to be asleep and he doesn't bother me."

"Yes, we still love print, don't we?"

"Someday when you have a kid of your own and you feel the urge to arbitrarily say no just because you can, you'll understand."

'We suspect death by Sunday supplement.'

Horace Greeley's Storm Battered Coat and Hat

"Darling, there's an offer for a time-share nest in Florida: Should we apply?"

"I hope I live long enough to see Bush's view of his legacy come true! I'll be around a long, long, long time!"

'We heat the entire building by burning resumes.'

'That's nothing new. Thatcher had a similar plan, but she called hers; 'Every man for himself'.'

Dog fetching a newspaper and then reading it himself.

3 Bottle Banks - Clear, coloured and rum bottles.

Cardboard, Paper, Comics.

Financial Times / Grandmother Prices

'Didn't you know that I read the comics every morning before I take the newspaper to Master?'

'And you say dogs are smarter because they FETCH the paper!'

Husband splashing tea over newspaper.

Sign reads: No lingering over a good cup of coffee.

I keep taking him back because I'm a big believer in recycling

"Yes, it is strange...usually he reads the 'Daily Gossip'."

NY Tribune Joins NY Herald on Hobby Horse of Anti-Grant Editorials