News Correspondents Gifts

'Georgia invaded Ossetia. Russia invaded Georgia. Our correspondent in Atlanta will explain that Americans have no idea what's going on.'

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

Occu-Pie Mars

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

'How fast can you hype?'

Squeezing the Free Press.

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

"The economy always seems to be recovering, but it never recovers."

Press Freedom

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

"The regular Fox news commentator was canned for being too soft on Iran. I'm Dick Cheney."

"Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!"

Man Reading Laptop.

Coronavirus Waves

"I'm going to miss it when they stop warning us"

"I mean the Saturday Night Live president, not the lousy one."

2020 Swiss barmy knife

"Reports that AI is planning a world takeover are greatly exaggerated."

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

Learn to Be a Critic In The Privacy Of Your Own Home With The Apex Correspondence School Of Criticism!

Journalism student ponders which course he wants to major in.

We have a problem with your research. We're Encyclopedia Britannica and you're Wikipedia.

BREAKING FAKE NEWS

"We live in interesting times. Present company exempted, of course."

'Of students surveyed, 64% prefer English and 32% prefer math. The fact that these numbers do not add up to 100 may help explain why.'

'I suppose that's where things get ironed out.'

'Mixed day on Wall Street. Economic indicators were up, but executive bonuses were down.'

As you can see, media coverage at this event is very heavy...