New Year's Resolution Seeker Gifts

'Norman's given up being an international man of action and universal sex symbol for the New Year.'

Let's get organized

"Good For You / Bad For You"

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

"It's a new year, and I have a brand new attitude. Which way is it to San Diego Sea World?"

"I think the 'Exotic Recipe' diet will make me lose weight. I'm running all over town trying to find the ingredients!"

"You need to do less talking the talk and more walking the walk."

Man to woman leaving health club: 'The instructor said I had lots of body definition ... plump, rotund, obese, heavy ...'

Yoga for beginners,

A push in the right direction: 50c.

'I'm downsizing in hopes of a merger.'

"Yes, I've made three resolutions - not to drink less, not to stop watching football on telly and not to spend more time at your mother's."

'You strap it on and it monitors your eating habits -- it's called the 'Fudgebuster.''

January Joiner

'However hard I try to lose weight, it always finds me again.'

Two entrances to a gym; one reads "Actual Exercise" while the other reads "Sit on Equipment and Stare at your Phone."

This year I thought I'd give up something different so I've given up writing Haiku poetry.

'Well, there goes the last of my New Years resolutions...'

"Gracie, I think you've made your point. We can't completely remove meat from this family's diet...but we will try very hard to cut back, OK?"

Man Walking Towards His Goal.

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

'Let it go. Get on with your death.'

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

"Look at me - I can do this!"

"If the nanny state wants us to solve the housing crisis they need to get out of the way and let us learn from the leaders in the field..."

'Look! A rock hard body in 90 days!'

"I can’t even find the motivation to quit my gym membership."

Woman on diet being chased by temptation.

'I want you to slow down, and that includes fast food.'

"Brian, isn't Dry January and Veganuary enough?!!"

My resolution this year? Getting in shape so I can lift my favorite snacks!

'I AM going to join a gym, but I've got to get in shape first. . .'

'For your aerobic exercise today, give me five 'Sweet Georgia Browns', a couple of 'Hot Times in the Old Town Tonight', and hit the showers.'

Preparing for Dating Opportunities in 2020