New Year Commitment Pillows

January Joiner

Let's get organized

"Good For You / Bad For You"

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'Sometimes it's difficult to get their feelings to the surface.'

"It's a new year, and I have a brand new attitude. Which way is it to San Diego Sea World?"

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

"What I really wanted was a dog, but my landlord won't allow it. So I got married instead."

"We don't have sex any more, we argue about money and you hate my mother. We should be married."

Unconditional Loveseat

I'm putting all my eggs in one basket.

"I think the 'Exotic Recipe' diet will make me lose weight. I'm running all over town trying to find the ingredients!"

The Female Brain and The Other One

"Till death us do part? Don't be so bloody morbid!"

"You need to do less talking the talk and more walking the walk."

Man to woman leaving health club: 'The instructor said I had lots of body definition ... plump, rotund, obese, heavy ...'

Yoga for beginners,

A push in the right direction: 50c.

It was getting harder and harder to stay psyched.

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

'You strap it on and it monitors your eating habits -- it's called the 'Fudgebuster.''

'However hard I try to lose weight, it always finds me again.'

'I'm downsizing in hopes of a merger.'

Two entrances to a gym; one reads "Actual Exercise" while the other reads "Sit on Equipment and Stare at your Phone."

This year I thought I'd give up something different so I've given up writing Haiku poetry.

'Well, there goes the last of my New Years resolutions...'

"Look at me - I can do this!"

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

'Are you serious? I thought 'For Better or for Worse' was just a comic strip.'

"When we met, Marc promised to be the wind under my wings but it turned out to be all hot air."

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

"If the nanny state wants us to solve the housing crisis they need to get out of the way and let us learn from the leaders in the field..."

'Look! A rock hard body in 90 days!'

Man Walking Towards His Goal.